T h e C h u r C h o f J e s u s C h r i s T o f L a T T e r - d a y s a i n T s • f e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
Heeding the
Prophet’s Call
to Rescue,
pp. 46, 56, 60
How to Help Children
Feel Safe, p. 14
Rejoicing in the
Gospel, p. 36
Breaking the Chains
of Debt, p. 63
usa
, D.C., Nto
NG
ashi
rt, Wa
y of
al GallerN
tio
tesy of the Na
Cour
The Return of the Prodigal Son, by Bartolomé Esteban Murillo When the prodigal son realized that he had
(Luke 15:21). But his father welcomed him home sinned, he humbly returned to his father and said, and said with joy, “For this my son was dead, and
“Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy is alive again; he was lost, and is found” (verse 24).
sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son”
Likewise, there is joy in heaven when we repent.
Contents February 2011
Volume 41 • Number 2
F e a t u r e s
8 Latter-day Prophets speak:
a Call for Missionaries
President Thomas S. Monson adds his voice
to those of previous prophets.
12 the atonement
Lisa Jan South
New life as a symbol for the Atonement.
28 Finding answers
Joseph Fielding McConkie
The fact that every Church member is given
the gift of the Holy Ghost is evidence that the Lord wants to reveal things to you.
44 revelation: Pouring down from heaven
Adam Olson
Knowledge pours down quickly when
4
we’re ready.
46 Parables of the Lost and Found
M e s s a g e s
Forgiving, reaching out, and
welcoming back.
52
First PresidenCy Message
Lost and Found: Me
4
Matthew Allen Bland
how great shall Be your Joy
How a family’s example
President Henry B. Eyring
changed my life.
visiting teaChing Message
Our hOMes, Our FaMiLies
7 a restoration of all things
14 helping Children Feel safe
Shawn Evans
Tips parents can use to help
children through difficult times.
18
On the COver
the Power of early Preparation
Front: Prodigal Son,
Ronald Errol Bartholomew
14
by Liz Lemon Swindle,
Foundation Arts, may
As the world waxes more
not be copied. Back:
wicked, our spiritual survival
Lost Coin, by J. Kirk
will depend on our preparation.
Richards.
22 young adults and Family home evening
These young adults know that family home
evening isn’t something they left at home.
Living as Latter-day saints
26 similarities and differences
Heather McOmber
A Relief Society lesson I’ll never forget.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
1
10
36
33
D e p a r t m e n t s
Did I Still Love Him?
Name withheld
Feelings of romance had turned to those of a
WHAT We BeLIeve
cordial friendship. What was I supposed to do?
10
36
The Atonement makes repentance possible
Questions & Answers
Christ atoned for our sins and made it possible Learning to rejoice in—and not be overwhelmed
for us to repent and become clean again.
by—living the gospel of Jesus Christ.
We TALk oF cHrIST
TeAcHIng, LeArnIng, ServIng
13
40
His grace Is Sufficient
Learning to Hear and
Kimberlee B. Garrett
Understand the Spirit
Iniquity seemed such a harsh word. Could it
David M. McConkie
really be the cause of my despair?
How to listen when the Spirit
66 LATTer-DAy SAInT voIceS
speaks.
When the Spirit speaks, do we listen and obey?
By STUDy AnD By FAITH
56
70 SmALL AnD SImpLe THIngS
Strengthening the
40
Less Active
73 FAmILy Home evenIng IDeAS
President Boyd K. Packer
How opportunities to serve and participate
74 neWS oF THe cHUrcH
can strengthen the less active.
79 In oTHer cHUrcH mAgAzIneS
goSpeL SoLUTIonS
60
80
From rescued to rescuer
UnTIL We meeT AgAIn
Betsy Doane
A Seat at the Bridegroom’s Feast
Pain and addiction ruled my life until that
Melissa Merrill
day at the airport.
Obedience is the only requirement for a place at the Savior’s feast.
provIDenT LIvIng
62 Learning to Be content
Breanna Sampson
comIng In mArcH
The problem was not with our house—it was
• Teaching the doctrine of the family
with me.
63
• A worldwide community of Saints
How We Broke the chains of Debt
• Elder and Sister Holland on Relief Society
Kate Strongin
We found ourselves in debt. Here’s what we
did about it.
2 E n s i g n
moreOnline
Ensign OnlinE
An officiAl mAgAzine of The church
If you’re looking to get more from your Church
of Jesus chrisT of lATTer-dAy sAinTs
february 2011 Volume 41 • Number 2
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at ensign.lds.org.
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Dieter f. uchtdorf
PErsOnal PrOgrEss
The Quorum of the Twelve Apostles:
Young women can now do their Personal Progress
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F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
3
F i r s t P r e s i d e n c y M e s s a g e
By President
Henry B. Eyring
First Counselor in the
First Presidency
How Great
SHall Be Your
Joy
Few joys in life are sweeter and longer lasting than missionaries: “I will send upon him the Comforter, knowing that you have helped others take the
which shall teach
him the truth and the way
restored gospel of Jesus Christ into their hearts.
whither he shall go; and inasmuch as he is faithful, I will Having that joy is the opportunity of every member of the crown him again with sheaves” (D&C 79:2–3).
Church. When we were baptized, we made a promise that And the promise of great joy for the faithful mis-we would “stand as witnesses of God at all times and in sionary is also ours as faithful members who give our all things, and in all places that [we] may be in, even until hearts to missionary work:
death, that [we] may be redeemed of God, and be num-
“And now, if your joy will be great with one soul
bered with those of the first resurrection, that [we] may that you have brought unto me into the kingdom of
have eternal life” (Mosiah 18:9).
my Father, how great will be your joy if you should All members accept part of the charge given to the bring many souls unto me!
Church to take the gospel of Jesus Christ to the world,
“Behold, you have my gospel before you, and
wherever and as long as they live. The Lord said it clearly: my rock, and my salvation.
“Behold, I sent you out to testify and warn the people,
“Ask the Father in my name, in faith believing
and it becometh every man who hath been warned to
that you shall receive, and you shall have the Holy warn his neighbor” (D&C 88:81). Full-time missionaries Ghost, which manifesteth all things which are expe-are to have the power to teach those who are not yet dient unto the children of men” (D&C 18:16–18).
members of the Church. Members of the Church are to In addition to the Holy Ghost to help us rec-have the power to find those the Lord has prepared for ognize and invite those ready to be taught, the
the missionaries to teach.
Lord has called and trained leaders to guide us. In We need to exercise our faith that the Lord has prea letter dated February 28, 2002, the First Presidency pared people around us to be taught. He knows who
placed increased responsibility for missionary work on they are and when they are ready, and He can guide us to bishops and wards. 1 With the help of the ward or branch them by the power of the Holy Ghost and give us words council, the priesthood executive committee develops a to invite them to be taught. The promise the Lord gave missionary plan for the unit. In that plan are suggestions to a missionary in 1832 is also the promise He gives to on how members can find those ready to be taught by us in our charge to find people ready for teaching by the the missionaries. There is a person called as the ward 4 E n s i g n
or branch mission leader. That mission
leader has close contact with the full-time
missionaries and their investigators.
There are many ways you can better
meet your personal obligation to help
find people for the missionaries to teach.
The simplest way will be the best.
Pray to be guided by the Holy Ghost.
Talk with local leaders and missionaries,
asking for their suggestions and promising
them your help. Encourage those involved
with you in this work. And be a witness at
all times in what you say and do that Jesus
is the Christ and that God answers prayers.
I testify that the Holy Ghost will direct
you to those who seek truth as you pray
and work for that guidance. And I know
from experience that your joy will be
lasting with those who choose to take
the gospel into their hearts and then
endure in faith. ◼
Note
1. See “News of the Church: Ward and Branch
Missionary Work Emphasized,” Liahona, Aug.
2002, 4; “Stake Missions Recently Dissolved,”
Ensign, June 2002, 76.
teachiNg from this message
• Teaching, No Greater Call instructs us to encourage those we teach to set goals
to help them live the principles they
have learned (see page 159). With the
family, consider identifying the bless-
ings of missionary work as mentioned
by President Eyring and, if prompted,
invite the family to set goals for sharing
the gospel.
• Consider brainstorming with the family
ways to share the gospel, remember-
ing President Eyring’s counsel that
ndersena
“the simplest way will be the best.” To
learn more about brainstorming, see
Teaching, No Greater Call, page 160.
tion by Welden C.
Photo illustra
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
5
F i r s t P r e s i d e n c y M e s s a g e
Y o u T h
C h i l d r e n
The Many Missionaries The Gospel—a Gift to Share in My life
By elizabeth s. stiles
the word gospel means all the teachings and ordinances given to us by Jesus christ and His prophets. the gospel is like a basket filled with gifts from Heavenly Father. you can the first sunday i attended
help give these gifts to other people. With whom could you church with the missionaries, i
share the gift of the gospel?
recognized people i had grown up
Match the scripture verses with the pictures of some of the with and knew from the community. i saw one of my best friends
gifts that are included in the gospel. Write on each picture from school, the elementary and
the number of its matching scripture.
high school secretaries, a girl i had
1. James 5:14–15
not been exceptionally nice to in
2. Mosiah 16:6–7
the past, and even a young man i
3. 3 nephi 18:1–10
once had a crush on.
4. d&c 20:72–73
each of these individuals had
5. d&c 33:16
a lasting impact on me. My best
6. d&c 89:4, 18–21
friend was a young woman of
7. d&c 132:46
great integrity, and because of
8. d&c 137:10
her i chose to continue investi-
9. d&c 138:32–34
gating the church. the secretar-
ies who remembered me from
school helped me know that i am
important. i learned about godly
love and charity from the young
woman who embraced me despite
my less-than-kind behavior toward
her in the past. My early teenage
crush set such a good example, i
recognized his light and wanted
to be around him.
these experiences helped me
learn that, even before my first
exposure to the missionaries,
Heavenly Father had prepared me
to receive the gospel through the
people He placed around me. From
tions by Dilleen Marsh
them i learned that the small things
we do can have great effect. Most
Ft: illustra
important, i have learned that mis-
sionary work starts with me.
steve Kropp; le
tions by
Ft: illustra
Far le
6 E n s i g n
V i s i t i n g t e a c h i n g M e s s a g e
a Restoration
Study this material and, as appropriate, discuss it with the sisters you visit. Use the questions to help you of all things
strengthen your sisters and to make Relief Society an active part of your own life.
Faith • Family • Relief
the Prophet Joseph Smith organized Relief What Can From Our History
Society as an essential part of the Church. As a
I Do?
1. What help will
sister Julie B. Beck has taught that “we
presidency, we hope we can help you understand
know through the Prophet Joseph Smith
why Relief Society is essential in your life.
i provide my sisters
that Relief Society was a formal part of the
We know that New Testament women showed
this month that
Restoration.” 2 The process of restoration
faith in Jesus Christ and participated in His work.
exemplifies the
began with the First Vision in 1820 and con-
Luke 10:39 tells of Mary, who “sat at Jesus’ feet, faith of female
tinued “line upon line, precept upon precept”
disciples of Jesus
and heard his word.” In John 11:27 Martha bears
christ?
(D&C 98:12). When the Relief Society was
witness of Christ: “She saith unto him, Yea, Lord: 2. What teaching
formal y organized on March 17, 1842, the
I believe that thou art the Christ, the Son of God, of the restored
Prophet taught the women about their essen-
which should come into the world.” Acts 9:36, 39
gospel will i study
tial place in the restored Church. He said,
speaks of “a certain disciple named Tabitha, . . .
to strengthen my
“The Church was never perfectly organized
testimony this
ful of good works. . . . And al the widows stood month?
until the women were thus organized.” 3
by . . . shewing the coats and garments which [she]
Notes
made.” Phebe, in Romans 16:1–2, was “a servant of
1. Julie B. Beck, “Fulfilling the Purpose of Relief For more informa-the church” and “a succourer of many.”
Society,” Liahona and Ensign, Nov. 2008, 108.
tion, go to www.
2. Julie B. Beck, “Fulfilling the Purpose of Relief These pat erns of faith, testimony, and service
reliefsociety.lds.org.
Society,” 108.
continued in the latter-day Church and were for-
3. Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Smith (2007), 451.
malized with the organization of Relief Society.
Julie B. Beck, Relief Society general president,
From the Scriptures
taught: “Just as the Savior invited Mary and Martha rTa
Joel 2:28–29; Luke 10:38–42;
of
of New Testament times to participate in His work, Ephesians 1:10
M
women of this dispensation have an official com-
Ty Museu
mission to participate in the Lord’s work. . . . The organization of Relief Society in 1842 mobilized the niversiu
col ective power of the women and their specific
assignments to build the Lord’s kingdom.” 1
young M
We accomplish our work as we focus on Relief
brigha
Society’s purposes: to increase faith and personal righteousness, strengthen families and homes,
Tesy of
and seek out and help those in need.
T, cour
I testify that Relief Society was divinely
organized to assist in the work of salva-
va K. Teicher
tion. Each Relief Society sister has an
essential role to play in accomplishing
by Miner
this sacred work.
tha, arm
Silvia H. Allred, first counselor in the
Relief Society general presidency.
y and arm
ome of h
t the
Jesus a
A Call for Missionaries
President Thomas S. Monson’s attention to missionary work is an extension of the M
Church’s emphasis on sharing the gospel, starting with the Prophet Joseph Smith.
ay I mention a matter
Following are the words of previous prophets on missionary work.
close to my heart and
which deserves our serious
attention?” said President Thomas S.
Joseph Smith
Monson in his opening remarks of the
(1805–1844)
First President
October 2010 general conference. “I
of the Church
speak of missionary work.” He then
“After all that has been said, the
extended a call for more full-time
greatest and most important duty is
missionaries:
to preach the Gospel” (Teachings
“To young men of the Aaronic
of Presidents of the Church: Joseph
Priesthood and to you young men
Smith [2007], 330).
who are becoming elders: I repeat
what prophets have long taught—that
Brigham Young
every worthy, able young man should
(1801–1877)
Second President
prepare to serve a mission. Missionary
of the Church
service is a priesthood duty—an obli-
“Our Father in Heaven, Jesus, our
gation the Lord expects of us who
Elder Brother and the Savior of the
have been given so very much. Young
world, and the whole heavens, are
men, I admonish you to prepare for
calling upon this people to prepare
photo by richard romney
service as a missionary. . . .
to save the nations of the earth, also EldErs
“A word to you young sisters: while
the millions who have slept without
you do not have the same priesthood
the Gospel” (Teachings of Presidents
responsibility as do the young men
of the Church: Brigham Young
Wilford Woodruff
to serve as full-time missionaries, you
[1997], 243).
(1807–1898)
Fourth President
also make a valuable contribution as
of the Church
missionaries, and we welcome your
John Taylor
“There never was a set of men
service.
(1808–1887)
Third President
since God made the world
“And now to you mature brothers
of the Church
under a stronger responsibility
and sisters: we need many, many more
“There are lots of able-bodied men
to warn this generation, to lift
senior couples. . . . I urge you to prepare
who, if they could only have a little
up our voices long and loud,
now for the day when you and your
more faith in God, and could realize
day and night as far as we have
spouse might [serve a mission]. As your
. . . the responsibilities of that priest-
the opportunity and declare the
circumstances allow, as you are eligible
hood that God has conferred upon
words of God unto this genera-
for retirement, and as your health per-
them, they would be ready to break
tion. We are required to do this.
mits, make yourselves available to leave
all barriers and say, Here I am, send
This is our calling. It is our duty.
home and give full-time missionary ser-
me; I wish to benefit the human fam-
It is our business” (Teachings
vice” (Thomas S. Monson, “As We Meet
ily” (Teachings of Presidents of the
of Presidents of the Church:
Together Again,” Ensign, Nov. 2010, 5–6).
Church: John Taylor [2001], 73–74).
Wilford Woodruff [2004], 93).
8 E n s i g n
Thomas S. Monson
to go forth and proclaim the gospel
Ezra Taft Benson
President
of the Lord Jesus Christ, the resto-
(1899–1994)
of the Church
Thirteenth President
ration again to the earth of the plan
of the Church
Sister “make a valuable contri-
of life and salvation” (Teachings of
“We urge you to seriously consider
bution as missionaries and we
Presidents of the Church: Heber J.
serving a full-time mission. . . .
welcome your service.”
Grant [2002], 84).
“Many couples can attest that their
missionary service was among their
Harold B. Lee
happiest times together because they
(1899–1973)
Eleventh President
were completely dedicated to one
of the Church
sistErs
purpose—missionary work” (Ezra Taft
“We witness in our missionary work
Benson, “Our Responsibility to Share
the magnificent spectacle of young
the Gospel,” Ensign, May 1985, 8).
men and young women [going]. . .
to all the ends of the earth, that by
their unselfish services they stand
as witnesses at all times and in all
places of the divine responsibility
upon the Church to teach the gos-
pel” (Teachings of Presidents of the
Church: Harold B. Lee [2000], 159).
Spencer W. Kimball
(1895–1985)
t casey
Twelfth President
of the Church
“The question is frequently asked:
photo by rober
Should every young man fill a mis-
t casey
Joseph F. Smith
sion? And the answer has been given
(1838–1918)
by the Lord. It is ‘Yes.’ . . .
Sixth President
photo by rober
of the Church
“We realize that while all men
“We want young men . . . who have
definitely should, all men are not
CouplEs
kept themselves unspotted from the
prepared to teach the gospel abroad.
world, and can go into the nations
. . . Yes, we would say, every able
Gordon B. Hinckley
of the earth and say to men, ‘Follow
worthy man should shoulder the
(1910–2008)
Fifteenth President
me, as I follow Christ.’” (Teachings of
cross. What an army we should have
of the Church
Presidents of the Church: Joseph F.
teaching Christ and him crucified!
“There is a constant need for more
Smith [2002], 78).
Yes, they should be prepared, usually
couple missionaries. They perform
with saved funds for their missions,
wonderful service throughout the
Heber J. Grant
and always with a happy heart to
world. You [leaders] need not wait for
(1856–1945)
serve” (Spencer W. Kimball, “When
the couples to volunteer. The sacri-
Seventh President
of the Church
the World Will be Converted,” Ensign,
fices associated with serving the Lord
“I want to emphasize that we as a
Oct. 1974, 8).
full time will abundantly bless the
people have one supreme thing to
couples, their families, and the peo-
do, and that is to call upon the world
ple they serve” (“To the Bishops of
to repent of sin, to come to God.
the Church,” Worldwide Leadership
And it is our duty above all others
Training Meeting, June 19, 2004, 27).
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
9
W h a t W e B e l i e v e
The repentance process
includes the following:
ReThpe ATeonnemtanc
enT mAkes e Have faith in our
Heavenly Father and
Jesus Christ (see Alma
34:17).
Possible
We come to earth for the Jesus Christ, to suffer for our sins.
purpose of growing
That is, Jesus paid the penalty
and progressing. We are
required by the law of justice for our
slowed in our progress when we sin.
breaking of God’s commandments.
Except for Jesus Christ, who lived a per-
Because the Savior suffered for our
fect life, everyone who has lived upon
sins, we will not have to suffer the
the earth has sinned (see Ecclesiastes
full punishment for them if we repent
7:20; Romans 3:23; 1 John 1:8).
(see D&C 19:16). His Atonement
To sin is to break God’s command-
“satisfied the demands of justice”
ments. Sometimes we sin by doing
(Mosiah 15:9), allowing Heavenly
something we know is wrong, but
Father to mercifully forgive us
sometimes we sin by failing to do what
and withhold punishment.
we know is right (see James 4:17).
Repentance is God’s gift to
Every commandment from God
us. It is essential for our hap-
blesses us if we obey it (see D&C
piness in this life. Through
130:20–21). However, if we disobey
repentance we become
it, there is a punishment attached (see clean again, making Alma 42:22). This meting out of bless-it possible for us
ings or punishments is called justice.
to return to our
Because our Heavenly Father loves Heavenly Father us, He has made it possible for us to
(see Moses
repent: to confess and forsake our
6:57).
sins and thus overcome their effects.
He sent His Only Begotten Son,
“He who has repented of his sins, the
same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember
them no more.
“By this ye may know if a man repenteth
of his sins—behold, he will confess them and
forsake them” (D&C 58:42–43).
10 E n s i g n
Confess our sins to
Heavenly Father and, if
Recognize our sins and
needed, to our bishop
Make restitution when
feel sorrow (see Luke
or branch president
Abandon our sins
possible (see Ezekiel
16:15; Alma 42:29–30).
(see D&C 61:2).
(see D&C 58:43).
33:15–16).
bunderson
steve
tions by
Forgive others who have
sinned against us (see D&C
Photo illustra
64:9; 3 Nephi 13:14–15).
Live righteously (see D&C 1:32). ◼
Jesus Christ paid the price for our sins in the For more information, see Gospel
Garden of Gethsemane and on the cross. He
Principles (2009), “Repentance,”
said of His suffering, “[It] caused myself, even 107–13; and True to the Faith (2004),
God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of
“Atonement of Jesus Christ,” 14–21;
“Justice,” 91–92; “Mercy,” 102–3;
pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer
“Repentance,” 132–35; and “Sin,”
both body and spirit” (D&C 19:18).
163–64.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
11
The Atonement
By Lisa Jan South
My happiness and peace
seemed forever gone,
leaving only regret—
until I saw the blackened earth.
One bad decision and a forest
was destroyed—
or would have been
except for the saving grace
and promise of new life
evidenced in small green shoots
pushing through the ashes.
D stokervi
Ph by Da
Photogra
12
W e T a l k o f C h r i s T
His Grace is
Sufficient
in my mind, I finally understood a
simple concept that somehow I had
missed all these years. When I have
By Kimberlee B. Garrett
L
unresolved sin in my life, even if it
ike many people, I have struggled and had not been sensitive to their is small, I give Satan power to influ-for much of my life to
feelings. I felt bad and resolved to do
ence me. He knows my weaknesses,
recognize my self-worth. I
better. I apologized to my children
and he knows what words will “stir
have fought weight problems for
and prayed for forgiveness. As soon
me up” and “lead me to destruction”
many years, which have contributed
as I prayed, my feelings of inade-
(see D&C 10:22). When it comes
to my negative feelings. Even though
quacy were lifted and I was able to
right down to it, I don’t hate myself,
I have lost weight and lead a healthy
feel the peace that had eluded me.
but Satan does hate me and will use
lifestyle now, occasionally I still find
As though a light switch turned on
every tactic available to turn me away
myself fighting off those negative
from the light.
thoughts and feelings.
However, when I repent, I rely on
One morning I felt particularly low
the power of Jesus Christ. Because He
and was wondering how to make
knows perfectly how to succor me
the situation better. I began to pray
in my weakness (see Alma 7:11–12),
and ask for Heavenly Father’s help
His power lifts me up and makes
to overcome these feelings of inad-
me strong in ways that I can’t be on
equacy. As I prayed, the following
my own.
scripture came to my mind: “If ye
Even the Apostle Paul, so valiant
have no hope ye must needs be in
in proclaiming the gospel, suffered
despair; and despair cometh because
weakness and was plagued by its
of iniquity” (Moroni 10:22).
effects on him. Nevertheless, when
Iniquity seemed to be such a seri-
he prayed to have the weakness
ous word, so much so that at first I
removed, the Lord answered, “My
discounted the thought because I
grace is sufficient for thee: for my
could think of nothing that I had done
strength is made perfect in weak-
seriously wrong. However, the thought
ness.” Paul then went on to exclaim,
persisted, so I prayed, as instructed
Like the Apostle
“Most gladly therefore will I rather
also by Moroni, for Heavenly Father to
Paul, I will do my
glory in my infirmities, that the
best to repent
show me my weakness that I might be
and obey the
power of Christ may rest upon me”
made strong (see Ether 12:27).
commandments
(2 Corinthians 12:9).
so the “power of
I found myself remembering three
Likewise, I will do my best to
Christ may rest
Illeen Marsh
incidents during the previous two
upon me.”
repent and obey the commandments
days when I had not shown patience
so the “power of Christ may rest upon
tIons by D
with my children. I had put my own
me” and I can be filled with peace
Illustra
moods and needs in front of theirs
and love. ◼
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
13
O u r H O m e s , O u r F a m i l i e s
Helping
Children
Feel Safe
By Shawn Evans
Licensed Clinical Social Worker,
LDS Family Services
We live in an age in which
anxiety over being separated from par-
difficult issues—such as
ents during a natural disaster or in the
divorce, illness, death,
months following a divorce. Parents
accidents, natural disasters, warfare,
can help young children in such
job loss—threaten the sense of secu-
circumstances by keeping as many
rity in the home. However, there
routines in place as possible. They can
are many things parents can do to
continue to have family prayers, family
help children feel a sense of stability,
meals, and other routines they had
security, and safety in spite of these
before the major change. This continu-
disrupting influences.
ity helps provide children a feeling of
comfort, confidence, and stability.
How Children React
In order to help children cope with
Seven to Ten Years Old
traumatic situations, first we must
Older children can understand
understand how they react to them.
when something or someone is taken
These reactions are affected by the
away permanently, whether it be
stability of the family and the child’s
moving from a home or coping with
age and emotional maturity.
By understanding
a parent’s death. As a result, they may
become preoccupied by the troubling
how children react to
Birth to Six Years Old
event. Their understanding of life has
traumatic situations,
An infant may express discomfort
been badly shaken. They might dis-
from disturbing events by fussing,
parents can help their
cuss the traumatic event repeatedly
crying, and desiring to be held. Often,
children cope during
as they try to understand how to deal
wise noted
all babies need is for a parent to hold
difficult times.
with the problem. They might need
them or feed them.
help making sense of or expressing
Young children are more mature
their feelings about the experience.
t Casey unless other
than babies. Nevertheless, a disruption
Remember, their reasoning abilities are
rober
in the child’s normal routine may
not those of an adult. For example, it
Phs by
cause a six-year-old to feel powerless.
is not uncommon for children to think
For instance, he or she may feel great
they are to blame for their parents’
Photogra
14 E n s i g n
divorce. Parents can help by learning
what their children are thinking and
feeling and then correcting misconcep-
tions their children may have.
Eleven to Eighteen Years Old
Children ages 11 to 18 may be con-
cerned about events occurring locally,
nationally, or internationally. Older
“There have been a lot of
teenagers start to realize they are
changes in my life. Some
going to transition from living at home
things that didn’t change
to facing the turbulent world on their
were family scripture study
own. They may become overwhelmed
and prayer. I love the scrip-
with intense emotions and not know
tures and am now trying to
how to talk about them.
read them on my own every
Parents can help their adolescent
day. I like the peaceful feel-
children by doing activities with them
ing I get when I read them.”
that their children like, such as making
lsono
Michael H., whose parents divorced and
dinner, playing board games, or playing
whose mother later remarried.
sports. Parents can also discuss chal-
dam C. a
lenging experiences they had when
Ph by
they were adolescents. As parents share
their thoughts and feelings, children
Photogra
will feel more comfortable in sharing
what they are thinking or feeling. This
is how emotional intimacy is devel-
“My mom taught me from
oped. Even if adolescents don’t show
the scriptures that I can
overt interest, they will be listening.
trust Heavenly Father even
though I can’t see Him.
What Parents Can Do
After the earthquake, when
Parents must first recognize that
I couldn’t find my mom,
their children are distressed. 1 Children
I knew that God would
might exhibit unusual behavioral
guide me, and He did. And
problems such as prolonged sadness
though my sister died, I
or irritability, increased or decreased
appetite, disrupted sleep patterns, an
knew that I would see her
inability to concentrate, or abnormal
again.”
performance in school. Older chil-
Anny A., a few months after the 8.0
magnitude earthquake in Peru in 2007.
dren may start to engage in high-risk
behaviors such as acting recklessly,
using harmful substances, becoming
sexually active, or withdrawing from
family, friends, and social situations.
You can help by knowing how to
nurture your individual children. For
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
15
“I know that adults talk about
bad things in life to warn me
and help me understand things.
But it helps if I also hear about
the good things in the world and
in their lives. It helps me remem-
ber how good life can be.”
Erica M., who had five family members and
friends die within the past 18 months.
example, you can teach your chil-
child. However, in many cases a child
dren, especially when they are young,
will not be able to deal with his or
descriptive words to identify the emo-
her troubling emotions without help.
tion they are feeling. Some of these
As you listen with empathy while
words include sad, angry, frustrated,
your children discuss their concerns,
afraid, worried, and tense.
they will feel loved and comforted.
If your teenager begins to act reck-
One successful method of listen-
lessly after a traumatic situation, listen
ing with empathy involves restating
carefully to his or her words and emo-
the child’s feelings to be certain you
tions. As with younger children, help
understand them. You may need to
your teenager correctly identify his or
help them identify what they are
her feelings. And be understanding,
feeling. You might say, “You seem
knowing that the traumatic event may
sad and tense when I ask you about
have triggered the reckless behavior.
your friend whose parents divorced.”
As you begin these conversations
Wait for the answer; then allow your
with your children, try to avoid moral-
child to continue the conversation.
izing and expressing anger, criticism,
Children tend to talk when they feel
or sarcasm. Identify the hurt or pain
“My dad finds time for us to
in control of the conversation.
your child is feeling and show empa-
be together, often when we
thy. You could start by saying, “I know
Help Children Process Feelings
are doing service for some-
you’re sad that your friend died. I can
A child’s sense of control can be
one else. He takes the time
only imagine how difficult that would
increased by helping the child to
to talk about life in general.
be. I’m concerned that you are starting
process unpleasant feelings. Often,
And when you talk, you
to drink alcohol as a reaction to your
as you listen with empathy, you and
can feel inner peace.”
pain.” Starting a conversation in a harsh
your child will be able to identify the
manner rarely leads to good outcomes.
Ryan P., whose father was unemployed
for almost a year.
cause of those feelings. You might
ask, “Why do you think you are feel-
Listen with Empathy
ing this way?” Wait for responses and
Sometimes you may be tempted
listen carefully to the answers. They
to avoid conversation with an upset
may not come right away.
16 E n s i g n
Sometimes you may need to brain-
storm alternative solutions. You could
ask how the solution your child is con-
sidering would affect others involved. Is
the potential solution respectful of your
family or friends? Is it realistic? How
does it make the child feel? He or she
may not figure out a solution immedi-
ately. Reassure your child that you love
him or her and that it is OK not to have
a solution right now.
Respond with Faith
As you identify unusual patterns
“There are scary, bad
of behavior in your children and
people in the world. But
then help them express and under-
my daddy helps me feel OK.
stand their thoughts and emotions
He calls me during the day
in an environment of love, your
and tells me he loves me.”
children will gain a sense of security
Ally V., whose father is a police officer.
and safety.
The most important thing you can
do to foster this feeling of security
and safety in the home is to build on
the principles of the gospel of Jesus
Christ. You can seek inspiration about
how to help your children by fasting,
The
praying, searching the scriptures, and
FoundaTion
attending the temple. You can talk to
oF Peace
your priesthood leaders. You might
“How do we
bring that peace
also consider getting professional
into the lives of
help, depending on how severe the
children who are
problems are.
growing up in trying, troubling
As you act with faith in Heavenly
times? . . . The best and most
Father and His Son, you will receive
meaningful resources are found
blessings of comfort and support.
within the home where faithful,
Children will receive an added mea-
devoted parents and supportive
brothers and sisters love one
sure of comfort and stability as you
another and teach one another
and they live by the words of the
of their divine nature.”
prophets and continue the practices
elder M. Russel Bal ard of the Quorum of
that bring peace into the home, such
the twelve Apostles, “Great Shal Be the
Peace of thy Children,” Ensign, Apr. 1994, 60.
as family and personal prayer, scrip-
ture study, and temple worship. ◼
Note
1. See John Gottmann and Joan DeClaire, The
Heart of Parenting: Raising an Emotionally
Intelligent Child (1997).
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
17
18 E n s i g n
The Power of
Early Preparation
As the world continues to grow more wicked, we must grow more faithful.
Our success will depend on how soon and how carefully we prepare.
By Ronald Errol Bartholomew
In my home growing up, my parents decided our fam- that, although I didn’t know much Korean, I knew many ily should hold family scripture study every day from lessons from the scriptures. That thought imbued me with 5:00 a.m. to 6:00 a.m. By the time I was in high school, confidence. My parents’ discipline was now paying off—I I had become increasingly unhappy about this “early could talk about the scriptures. So I shared a few stories morning family tradition” and did all I could to show my from the Old Testament using the best Korean I could, lack of appreciation for it. I’d put my blanket over my then sat down, filled with gratitude for those many long head, lie on my pillow, and snore out loud in protest. But years of early morning scripture study.
my parents persevered. We read and re-read the Book of Over the years, I’ve learned that the example my par-Mormon, the Doctrine and Covenants, the Pearl of Great ents set for me as they prepared me for my mission and Price, and even the Bible using an audio recording.
adulthood was something I could implement in the lives When I left home for college I was disappointed to dis-of my own children. In fact, preparing our children is cover that I had lost the ability to sleep in. I woke up every something we as parents must do. President Henry B.
day at 5:00 a.m., no matter what, and without trying. As a Eyring pointed out why:
full-time missionary I realized how valuable my parents’
“We will need to have developed and nurtured faith insistence on consistent early morning prayer and scrip-in Jesus Christ long before Satan hits us, as he will, with ture study was. It happened when I was asked to speak in doubts and appeals to our carnal desires and with lying Church my first Sunday in Korea.
voices saying that good is bad and that there is no sin.
I was concerned that I had no idea about what I was Those spiritual storms are already raging. We can expect going to say, especially given the difficulties of a new that they will worsen until the Savior returns.
ard
language. But I had agreed to speak, so I prepared as
“However much faith to obey God we now have, we will well—or as feebly—as I could. Then it was time, and there need to strengthen it continually and keep it refreshed con-tIons by Jeff W
I was, looking out on the audience of Korean Saints and stantly. We can do that by deciding now to be more quick Illustra
investigators. I was suddenly struck with the realization to obey and more determined to endure. Learning to start F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
19
early and to be steady are the keys to spiritual preparation.
Procrastination and inconsistency are its mortal enemies.” 1
As President Eyring explained, because the current storms will only increase, our current level of preparation also needs to increase. The secret to our success is to be consistent and to start early.
Focus on Eternal Priorities
Sometimes it is difficult to incorporate the practices of personal and family prayer, scripture study, and temple attendance into our busy daily lives. That is why it is important to plan frequently how we are going to accomplish these goals. As a friend of mine once mused, “If I were the devil, I don’t think I could get to Latter-day Saints with any We also need to focus on eternal truths through of the big sins. I think I would just keep them busy.”
family prayer, family home evening, and family We need to make sure we don’t allow anything to inter-gospel study—especially the Book of Mormon.
fere with our divine duties to prepare ourselves and our children early and consistently. This can involve a lot more than just busy schedules.
Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve truths. The Lord once reminded the Prophet Joseph Smith Apostles said that “some parents become so expert at fill-and Sidney Rigdon that Satan would try to take away light ing every physical desire for their children that they begin and truth from their families “through disobedience . . .
to suppose that all is well in this life and that their eternal and because of the tradition of their fathers” (D&C 93:39).
stewardship is progressing right on schedule. . . . I believe He reminded them that “truth is knowledge of things as that we must pause and take a careful inventory to deter-they are, and as they were, and as they are to come.” He mine how well our families are doing spiritually. We could said that “whatsoever was more or less than this [truth]
ask how well are we feeding, nurturing, training, and is the spirit of that wicked one who was a liar from the exercising the spirits of our children; or how well have we beginning” (D&C 93:24–25; emphasis added).
taught, trained, loved, and inspired our children to build One of the challenges Satan places in our paths is to their spiritual muscles and strength? . . . Remember, eter-distract us from gospel truths by causing us to focus on nity is now, not a vague, distant future. We prepare each things that may be true but not important. That can lead to day, right now, for eternal life. If we are not preparing for a myriad of problems, including frustration with oneself, eternal life, we are preparing for something else, perhaps family, friends, and even the gospel.
something far less.” 2
Here’s an example: The doctrine or “truth” about hav-Though we may be necessarily preparing our youth for ing babies is simple and wonderful. Babies are Heavenly short-term goals, we cannot allow those things to distract Father’s spirit children who need to come to the earth and us from our larger eternal goals. We need to start early to receive bodies as part of His eternal plan of bringing to establish regular patterns of gospel living.
pass their immortality and eternal life. We get to participate in this wondrous plan as parents, advisors, friends, Develop a Love for Gospel Truths
and mentors.
One important part of preparing our children for eter-But there are a lot of things that are true about having nity is helping them learn and develop a love for gospel babies that, from a certain point of view, are not so nice.
20 E n s i g n
These ideas can even distract us from the heavenly plan.
unusual difficulty in finding a mature couple who were For example, babies are cute but inconvenient, adorable available to play the parts of Lehi and Sariah, a thought but expensive. Babies often smell bad and keep one came to me: “Ask your parents.” I inquired and they awake in the night. And the more babies you have, the agreed to do it.
more stretched your financial and physical resources may The first evening of the three-day youth conference cul-become. Besides, babies can cause stretch marks and minated with a reenactment of Lehi’s dream. It was dark, weight gain. Having babies may disrupt a woman’s long-so the leaders were all busy helping the youth find and term career aspirations.
hold onto an iron rod that led them to a tree representing Each of these observations about babies is true—and the tree of life, which was illuminated in a clearing on the the emotional distress such issues can cause are certainly top of a large hill. As the youth approached the tree, my real. However, none of them encourages us to embrace parents, acting as Lehi and Sariah, picked glowing “fruit”
the saving truth about babies and their role in the plan hanging from this tree and distributed it to them. It just so of salvation. In fact, if we place too much of our focus on happened that I was the last person to arrive at the tree.
these true facts about having babies, we may find ourAs I approached the tree after a long and exhausting day, selves at odds with Heavenly Father’s plan for us as indi-I had a sudden epiphany when I considered that the two viduals and as members of a family. As we raise a family, people representing Lehi and Sariah were in fact my own we learn to be unselfish, to love others more than our-parents. The scene took on special significance when my selves, to serve, to sacrifice, and to teach. Learning these father reached up and pulled some of the fruit from the traits helps us to become more like our Heavenly Father, tree and handed it to me. Then I understood something who has said that His work is “to bring to pass the immor-clearly: as a young man I hadn’t received my knowledge tality and eternal life” of His children (Moses 1:39).
of the gospel from someone else—I had received it from As we do everything we can to prepare ourselves and my father and mother—one day at a time, one morning at our children spiritually now and for future storms, we a time, amidst my grumbling and moaning and complain-must learn and emphasize gospel truths over things that ing. It occurred to me that in Lehi’s dream, the Lord hadn’t are distracting, even if they are factually true.
come down and personally called Nephi to the tree—He did so through Nephi’s father, Lehi—and for me, it was Read The Book of Mormon
my parents.
President Marion G. Romney said if we prayerfully
As we strive to prepare ourselves and our youth
and regularly read the Book of Mormon in our homes spiritually, we can have a tremendous impact—even
and with our children, “the spirit of that great book will though we may not readily be aware of it. Thus, we must come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein.
be patient. Rearing children in the gospel is a process, The spirit of reverence will increase; mutual respect and not an event. The secret is to start early, be consistent, consideration for each other will grow. The spirit of con-plan for life’s demands, focus on eternal truths, and tention will depart. . . . Faith, hope, and charity—the pure study the gospel—especially the Book of Mormon.
love of Christ—will abound in our homes and lives.” 3 I Through our efforts, trusting in the Savior’s grace to have seen these changes occur slowly and incrementally compensate for our weaknesses, we can succeed. And over many years of serious and consistent personal and through these efforts, we can find peace in our lives family study. These blessings are not always realized in and joy with our children. ◼
their fulness immediately.
When I was serving as a stake Young Men president, NoTes
1. Henry B. Eyring, “Spiritual Preparedness: Start Early and Be Steady,”
the decision was made to reenact scenes from the Book Liahona and Ensign, Nov. 2005, 38.
2. M. Russell Ballard, “Spiritual Development,” Ensign, Nov. 1978, 66.
of Mormon for youth conference. When we experienced 3. Marion G. Romney, “The Book of Mormon,” Ensign, May 1980, 67.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
21
Young Adults and
Family Home Evening
Members of the Church across
But family home evening is
the world reserve Monday
also an important part of my cur-
nights for family home eve-
rent stage of life. Sometimes it’s
ning. As taught by modern prophets,
easier to stay home on a Monday
family home evening is a time “for
night, especially if the weather is
group activity, for organizing, for the
bad or if I have lots of studying
expressions of love, for the bearing of
to do. But nearly every time I
testimony, for learning gospel prin-
have this dilemma, I go to family
ciples, for family fun and recreation,
home evening anyway because I
and of all things, for family unity and
know it’s important to be around
solidarity.” 1
other young single adults to talk
For the following young adults,
about the gospel and have fun
family home evening is a priority.
together. Even when only a few
Not all of them live with parents or
others attend, it is still a great
siblings. Some participate in fam-
experience.
ily home evening with roommates
or ward members or friends from
institute. Still others set aside time
for private devotion. But all of them
recognize the immediate and future
have learned how to teach in a small
blessings in their lives from following
group, I have come to better under-
the admonition of prophets to partici-
stand the gospel principles I was
pate in family home evening.
taught while investigating the Church,
and I have seen others grow when
A Blessing in All Aspects of Life
they teach or share their testimonies.
As a convert and the only member I know that these are important of the Church in my family,
skills for my future. When I have
I attend family home evening at
my own family, I will know how to
the young adult center in my city.
organize a powerful and fun family
Participating in family home evening
home evening because of the good
has been important to me because I
examples I’ve seen.
22 E n s i g n
The nice thing about having fam-
are very busy and family time is
ily home evening at the young adult
rare, home evening is a wonderful
center is that we can come early or
opportunity to be together and
stay late to study, practice the piano,
strengthen each other.
play games, or just relax—there is
always something to do.
I know when I’m obedient
and follow the prophetic admo-
nition to participate in family
An Opportunity to Share My Faith
home evening, I am blessed.
I am a 24-year-old young man who
I have seen evidence of this
has gained a strong testimony of
in my studies, in my work, in
the gospel of Jesus Christ by follow-
being blessed with energy for
ing the prophetic admonition to hold
the week ahead, and in feeling
family home evening. Although I am
generally uplifted.
the only member of the Church in my
Lenneke Rodermond, Netherlands
family, after I was baptized, I real-
ized that family home evening could
A Foundation upon Which
strengthen us, and I decided to intro-
to Build
duce it at home.
I was raised in a family in which
The whole family now knows that
we regularly had family home
Mondays are special days when we
evenings. I remember that when
gather as a family to learn gospel truths.
I was a child, family home eve-
Sometimes we resolve problems in the
nings were one of the most
family or discuss challenges, needs, or
important events in my life, and
interests of individual family members.
I would wake up excitedly each
Another blessing that has come
I have learned how to really commune
Monday morning and remind my
from my parents’ efforts is that I’ve
with my Heavenly Father and to coun-
parents that family home evening
been given a firm foundation upon
sel with my family members in love.
was that night. Today as a young
which to build my testimony of Jesus
As a result, we have been more united,
adult, I live with my parents and
Christ. Though I learned the gospel in which is a great blessing.
continue to spend this special time
church, it was through family home
In addition, family home evening
with my family each week.
evening lessons that I really came to
has laid a strong foundation for my
sly
Because our family consistently
understand its principles. As a result,
family in the gospel of Jesus Christ,
had family home evening from the
I’ve been able to go to church and
and they are now investigating the
randall
time I was very young, I have always
grow in the gospel based on my own
Church. In fact, the full-time mission-
tIons by
understood its importance. In Korea,
faith and not on that of my parents.
aries join us for family home evening
Illustra
where many parents and children
Hye Ri Lee, Korea
once in a while.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
23
Family Home evening is For everyone
“It is for families with parents and children, for families with just one parent, and for parents who have no children at home. It is for home evening groups of single adults and for those who live alone or with roommates. . . . Regular participation in family home evening will develop increased personal worth, family unity, love for our fellowmen, and trust in our Father in heaven.”
forward to the blessings it will
President Spencer W. Kimball (1895–1985), President N. Eldon Tanner bring when I have a family of
(1898–1982), and President Marion G. Romney (1897–1988), Family Home
Evening: Happiness through Faith in Jesus Christ (1976), 3.
my own.
Chieko Kobe, Japan
A Remedy for Homesickness
I grew up in a family in which
my parents have been a
I know that when I get married,
glowing example to my two
my family will be blessed through
brothers, my sister, and me, and
family home evening, but I am also
our family has received many
grateful that I’ve been able to make
blessings because of their efforts.
family home evening an important
For instance, we have grown
part of my life now. I know that The
together to become a close fam-
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day
ily, turning to each other in times
Saints is true and that the family
of need or trials. And although
home evening program is inspired
some of my family members
of God.
are less active, they still join in
Lebani Butawo, Zimbabwe
family home evening.
I spent some time living in
An Established Priority
Sydney, Australia, and was very
I was raised in a family that made
homesick living so far from
family home evening a priority.
Ireland. Luckily, I lived near a
In order to make it home in time
Church meetinghouse where I
on Mondays, we would go straight
attended family home evening
home from school without making
rotated who would give the lesson,
with other young adults. This was
plans to be with friends. Personal
who would prepare the refresh-
a great blessing to me, and when I
tasks, such as homework, were com-
ments, and who would say the
attended, I no longer felt homesick.
pleted following family home eve-
opening and closing prayers. We
It was great to mingle with fellow
ning. There really was nothing that
didn’t just listen to lessons but also
members in a relaxed setting and
took precedence over this special
had opportunities to be instructors.
where the Spirit was present.
time for our family to be together.
As a result, I was blessed to obtain
Linda Ryan, Ireland
Family home evening made an
a knowledge and testimony of the
impact on us growing up not only
gospel and to have strengthened
Something I Never Regret
because of the priority we placed
family ties.
I joined the Church in May 2009.
on it but also because we worked
Because family home evening has
Since then I have quickly come
together to make it happen. We
become a habit in my life, I look
to value the blessings that come
24 E n s i g n
from consistently attending family
Everyone was having a great time,
A Priority for All of Us
home evening. One memorable
even if he or she didn’t win, but
experience occurred when our
There are many ways that I could
that’s not what made the experience
spend Monday nights, from
young single adult ward played
special to me. What really made it
participating in university societies
“chair soccer,” a variation of
to other sporting and recreational
indoor soccer, in the cultural
activities. But those who live in
hall of a local meetinghouse.
our student house—all Latter-
The point was to defend your
day Saints—have decided that it
chair while attacking other
is important to hold family home
people’s with a rubber ball. I
evening, and we make it a prior-
formed an al iance with two
ity. We have chosen this priority to
other players; by the end we
strengthen one another during a
were the only three still in the
time of life when living the gospel
game, and we promptly turned
could be seen as difficult. Sharing
on each other. Instead of getting
testimonies and experiences with
upset about it, we couldn’t stop
one another has brought us closer
laughing! It was the most fun I
together as young adults and
have had in ages, and I know
friends.
that I would be hard pressed to
Family home evening is a time
find an experience like that any-
in the week when I can count on
where outside of the Church.
receiving spiritual nourishment. On
numerous occasions I have come to
family home evening with questions
in my mind only to find the answers
in lessons or spiritual thoughts that
memorable was the spirit of friend-
are shared. It is also a time to set and
ship I felt at the activity.
reflect on goals that help me develop
Moments like this help me lighten
personally.
the overwhelming stress of graduate
Having made the decision to con-
school. No matter how the week has
sistently hold family home evening, I
gone, I know that I will always feel
don’t consider it a sacrifice. I know it
better if I go to family home evening. is where I should be; it is also where I may not always be thrilled about
I want to be. ◼
the activity and I may not always
Luc Rasmussen, Wales
want to take the time, but I never
Note
regret going.
1. Joseph Fielding Smith, Harold B. Lee, and
N. Eldon Tanner, Family Home Evenings,
Matt Adams, Nebraska, USA
1970–71 (1970), v.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
25
Similarities and
By Heather McOmber
“Differences.” The teacher began by asking
us to list the similarities between a married
That Relief Society
lesson helped me see I
will never forget a particular Relief
Society lesson I heard in a young
single adult ward. At the start of the
Relief Society sister and a single Relief Society
lesson there was a blank chart on a white
sister. There was an almost audible groan and
myself, and others,
board with two columns. The first column
a collective mind freeze. One sister started
in a way I never
was labeled “Similarities” and the second
with a hint of sarcasm, stating: “Well, we are all had before.
26 E n s i g n
Differences
female.” And that seemed to neatly sum-
prone to focus on what
marize how we all felt on the subject.
makes us different from
But the teacher persisted. Gradually
each other, sisters in the
hearts opened and the list of similarities gospel do have a lot in began to grow: hopes, fears, strengths,
common. We need not act
weaknesses, responsibilities, talents,
based on fear of rejection or the
the gospel, covenants, faith, courage,
assumption that we have nothing
potential, pain, sorrows, fatigue, and
to offer each other. Seeing how
personal need of the Atonement.
alike we truly are has helped me
The list continued until the teacher
feel confident to stand as an equal
had to ask us to move onto listing our
with my sisters in the gospel.
differences. Of course, everyone imme-
But the exercise reached even fur-
diately called out: “husband!”
ther still. Not only did it build a bridge
But then there was a stunned silence. between married sisters and me but also Surely there had to be more than that.
between all of God’s children and me. That
The list included a few feeble attempts
we are all His children is our common her-
at finding differences—things like “we
itage. Our differences lie only in the details
may or may not have children” or “we
and packaging of our lives. Satan and his
have different responsibilities.” Most
work thrive by enhancing our differences—
of us, though, were simply stunned by
teaching us that we cannot relate to one
the fact that what we thought would be another. But the similarities among Heavenly the short list ended up being the long
Father’s sons and daughters are so great that
list, and what we thought would be the
if we choose to focus on them instead of on
long list was actually the short list.
our differences, unity is bound to increase
Until that lesson, I had not realized
(see Moses 7:18).
how different I had let myself belie
luke
ve
I will always be grateful for that lesson that
I was from other sisters in the gospel
helped me see others with new eyes, focused
simply because they are married and
my vision on similarities, and brought me to a
tion by John
I am not. This simple activity instilled
more understanding state of mind and heart. ◼
in me a bond of unity with my sisters.
For additional reading, see Jan Underwood,
Photo illustra
I saw with new eyes. I realized that
“Seeing Beyond the Category: Reflections on A
even in a world where people are often Single Life,” Ensign , Mar. 1984, 27.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
27
A s you seek
direction, the
Holy Ghost will lead
you far beyond your
own thoughts and
mark a course that
reaches beyond that
which you can see
even by the light of
day.
Finding
Answers
It is not the design of heaven that we be rescued from all difficult situations.
Rather, it is the Lord’s will that we learn to handle them.
By Joseph Fielding McConkie
BYU Emeritus Professor of Ancient Scripture
Not long after I graduated from college We were extremely pleased when we received I found myself in Vietnam. I had been
word that Bishop Victor L. Brown (1914–1996) of
commissioned an officer in the United
the Presiding Bishopric was coming to visit. We
States army and was serving as a Latter-day Saint
were to travel with him from one end of Vietnam
chaplain. Throughout the country, LDS service-
to the other, meeting with as many LDS service-
men were organized into mobile groups that
men as possible. Prior to Bishop Brown’s visit,
functioned like quorums and moved with their
Chaplain Smith and I made a list of the questions
military units. Every mobile group acted under
we wanted to ask him relating to our specific chal-the direction of one of three districts, each of
lenges and committed them to memory.
which covered about a third of the country.
Servicemen came from all over the country to
Our district president was an air force chap-
meet with Bishop Brown. We held meetings on the
M
lain by the name of Farrell Smith. I served as his sides of runways, in bunkers, and in ditches. We
y Museu
first counselor. As chaplains we were responsi-
sometimes held meetings with the ground rumbling
istorh
ble for meeting the spiritual needs of the mili-
beneath our feet and guns thundering around us. In h C
tary units to which we were assigned—including some instances we met in small military chapels.
25 of these mobile quorums. As the units
Between meetings, Chaplain Smith and I took
tesy Chur
deployed, the soldiers often found themselves in turns asking Bishop Brown questions. His coun-a different place each Sunday, but thanks to LDS sel was wise, but what we were doing became D Linn, Courvi
helicopter pilots who found a way to get us to
evident, and he halted our questioning.
T, by Da
wherever we needed to be, the system worked
“Brethren,” he said, “I am going to tell you a
ca
Tial
well. Even so, the problems we faced reached
story. You won’t like it, but it is a great story.”
far beyond our experience.
It centered on a young man with a difficult
The ini
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
29
B ut behold, I say
unto you, that
you must study it out
in your mind; then
Twelve Apostles. I will present
you must ask me if
the matter to him.”
it be right, and if it
The next day, as he met with
is right I will cause
the Apostle, the stake president
that your bosom shall
raised the matter. The Apostle lis-
burn within you;
tened attentively and asked a few
therefore, you shall
questions to ensure that he fully
feel that it is right”
understood what was involved.
(D&C 9:8).
He then said, “President, I have
no idea what to tell you, but this
afternoon I will be meeting with
President McKay. I will ask him.”
That afternoon he met with President
David O. McKay (1873 –1970) and carefully
explained the problem. President McKay
listened attentively and asked a few ques-
tions to ensure that he understood all that
was involved. He said, “Well, that’s his
problem, isn’t it?”
As Bishop Brown had predicted, we did
not like the story. It brought an end to our
question session and led to the realization
that our problems were ours to solve. That
is why the Lord had placed us there.
Learning to Solve Our Own Problems
problem. He did not know what to do, so he visited with That lesson is one that we are generally reluctant to his bishop for counsel.
learn. My father and grandfathers had a great love of the The bishop listened carefully and thoughtfully. He gospel and were marvelous sources of understanding. I iri
asked a few questions to ensure that he understood all have, however, a distinct memory of the occasion when
©
that was involved. He then confessed that he had no idea I went to my father with some gospel questions only to smith
what counsel to give but told the young man that he receive the following response: “Look, Junior, you have would present the matter to the stake president when they the same sources available to you as I have to me.” More ls; Christina a
met the following evening.
important than any answers these men gave to my ques-enrik h
The next evening the bishop met with the stake presi-tions was their teaching me how to get answers for myself.
©
dent. He explained the young man’s problem. The stake They are now gone. Questions continue, as does the con-president listened attentively and asked a few questions to fidence that the same sources that were available to them ensure he understood all that was involved. He then said, are available to me.
tions by Jan Friis
“Bishop, I have no idea what to tell you, but tomorrow In Doctrine and Covenants 9:8 we find the process
I will be meeting with a member of the Quorum of the of revelation: “But behold, I say unto you, that you must Photo illustra
30 E n s i g n
study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be Acting When No Sure Answer Comes
right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall There will be some instances when no sure answer
burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.”
comes. We have a series of revelations in the Doctrine and This process is designed to balance our experience and Covenants in which the Lord tells the early missionaries of agency with the wisdom of heaven.
this dispensation that some matters were to be left to their discretion. The phrase that is often repeated is “it mattereth Seeking the Companionship of the Holy Ghost
not unto me” (D&C 60:5; 61:22; 62:5).
We frequently speak of our right to the constant com-President Brigham Young explained this doctrine: “If I panionship of the Holy Ghost. Perhaps an analogy, one do not know the will of my Father, and what he requires my father taught me, will help in distinguishing between of me in a certain transaction, if I ask him to give me wis-receiving a revelation from the Holy Ghost and having the dom concerning any requirement in life or in regard to my gift of the Holy Ghost.
own course, or that of my friends, my family, my children, Imagine yourself traveling in the dark of night through rugged and difficult terrain, seeking a place of safety where you will be reunited with your family. Let us also suppose that a flash of lightning momentarily marks the path of safety before you. This brief flash of light represents a manifestation through the Holy Ghost.
If you then follow the path it marked out, it will lead you to the waters of baptism and to confirmation as a member of the Church. The authority who confirms you will say,
“Receive the Holy Ghost,” meaning the gift of the Holy Ghost. The light by which you now walk is the companionship of the Holy Ghost. It is the light of the gospel—or, for some, the gospel in a new light. In either case, it enables you to see that which you could not see before. It now becomes your privilege to walk, as it were, by the light of day. The light is constant, and, in most instances, the path you are called on to travel is clearly marked. When it is not, you are entitled to the visions, impressions, or prodding necessary to assure your arrival at the place of safety.
The fact that every member of the Church is given the gift of the Holy Ghost is evidence that the Lord wants to reveal things to you and through you. Joseph Smith said,
“No man can receive the Holy Ghost without receiving revelations. The Holy Ghost is a revelator.” 1
As you serve in Church callings and seek direction, that or those that I preside over, and get no answer from him, same Spirit will lead you far beyond your own thoughts and then do the very best that my judgment will teach me, and mark a course that reaches beyond that which you he is bound to own and honor that transaction, and he can see even by the light of day.
will do so to all intents and purposes.” 2
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
31
T he role of the
Holy Ghost
is as important in
determining what
if any person needed wisdom from God,
I did” (Joseph Smith—History 1:12).
we pray about as it
Do you see what is taking place?
is in giving us the
Joseph was getting a revelation telling
answers we seek.
him to go get a revelation. The Spirit
was directing him in what he prayed
for, and because the Spirit was his com-
panion in the asking of the question, he could ask with complete faith.
In 3 Nephi, the Savior says, “And whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, which is right, believing Asking the Right Question
that ye shall receive, behold it shall be given unto you”
In finding answers we must seek the balance between (3 Nephi 18:20).
agency and inspiration. Let me share a fundamental but Think of that! We have the sure promise that if we pray often overlooked principle relative to getting answers to in the manner prescribed by Jesus Christ and ask for that prayers and questions that trouble us.
“which is right,” it shall be given unto us.
Few things facilitate getting the right answer like asking the right question. A mother told me a story about the Learning to Handle Difficult Situations
disappointing behavior of a man after he had been called as I return to where we began, with two young chaplains in a priesthood leader. “How,” she asked, “can I explain to my Vietnam. My story is a nearly universal one. Each of us must children that callings in this Church are inspired and at the grow up and leave the security of home and the protective same time explain the behavior of this man?”
care of parents to enter a world full of problems and chal-While I share her concern over what took place, her lenges that reach far beyond our experience. As we venture question infers that if a leader makes a mistake then their out, we would like a ready source to tell us how to handle calling was not inspired. Perhaps a better question would every difficult situation. But that is not the Lord’s system.
be: should my faith rest in the infallibility of priesthood It is not the design of heaven that we be rescued from leaders or in the assurance that if I keep my covenants, the all difficult situations. Rather, it is the Lord’s will that we Spirit of the Lord will always be my companion?
learn to handle them.
Often what stands between us and answers to our
The sense of being overwhelmed is very much a part prayers is our failure to ask the right questions. Thus the of the journey. The power with which God clothes us in role of the Holy Ghost is as important in determining what His holy temples does not imply that our journey will be aseyc
we pray about as it is in giving us the answers we seek.
an easy one.
t
Perhaps the greatest revelation of this dispensation was As we accept our lot and move forward with what the rober
the one Joseph Smith received prompting him to go into Lord has asked of us, we discover that we enjoy the com-the woods to find a place to pray. Having read the injunc-pany of the Holy Ghost, angels feel constrained to join us, t casey © 2008
tion in James, he said:
and the heavens open to our vision. ◼
rober
“Never did any passage of scripture come with more From a devotional address given at Brigham Young University, December 12, power to the heart of man than this did at this time to 2006. For the full text, visit speeches.byu.edu.
tion by
mine. It seemed to enter with great force into every feeling NoteS
1. History of the Church, 6:58.
of my heart. I reflected on it again and again, knowing that 2. Deseret News, Feb. 27, 1856, 402.
Photo illustra
32 E n s i g n
Did I Still
Love Him?
When faced with the idea of
breaking off my engagement, I
realized that doubts about my
worth were getting in the way
of my happiness.
Name withheld
Leaning against the front door, I
gazed into the hall and couldn’t
believe what I was feeling. I
had just said good-bye to Thomas,
my fiancé, and sent him out into
the evening snow to drive home.
We had been engaged for only a
couple of weeks and everything
had gone so smoothly. Both of us
had felt prompted that the Lord
prepared us to meet and marry
each other if we chose. So why
was I feeling so confused?
My love for Thomas had
suddenly and unexpectedly
gone cold. When I looked at or
thought of him, the romantic
feelings that had been grow-
ing in me turned to those of a
simple, cordial friendship. This
change made no sense to me,
but how could I marry someone
shcrofta
I thought of as “just a friend”?
That night I prayed earnestly
tIons by Jeff
for the Lord’s help in knowing
Illustra
what I should do.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
33
The next day as I read my scrip-
tures, I continued to ponder my pre-
dicament. A memory came to mind of
a time when Thomas told me I was
beautiful. I had turned my head
away and changed the subject. Later
Thomas asked why I hadn’t believed
him. What I realized then was that
over the years, I had somehow con-
vinced myself that I wasn’t attractive.
After Thomas expressed his concern, I
began trying to trust his sincerity; even-
tually I didn’t have any trouble accepting
his compliments.
As I considered my present circumstance,
I realized that I was doing the same thing
with Thomas’s love for me. I didn’t believe he
could love me enough to marry me, so I was
letting go of my feelings for him.
I puzzled over why I felt this way. I thought
back to my life before I met Thomas. I had
graduated from college and served a mission.
I was never one of the girls who got asked
out on dates much. In fact, most of my dating
experiences had been group girl-ask-guy activ-
ities. It seemed that all my efforts to be the best person I could be spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially had brought me
many friends and great career opportunities but
hadn’t brought me any closer to marriage. I felt
discouraged and overlooked, even when I was
trying to be grateful for everything that was so
good in my life.
So, in social relationships my defense mech-
anisms kicked in. I taught myself to believe
that I just wasn’t lovable romantically. Romance
was something I could never expect in life,
34 E n s i g n
something impossible for me to
went back into “just friends” mode—my usual
H eavenly
have. I stopped hoping for it. I
wall of protection against potential failed hopes.
Father
didn’t feel that I was unsuited for
It was a wall that, apparently, had done more
responded to my
marriage, but I was trying to save
harm than good. Because I had difficulty believ- prayers by helping myself from the pain of failed
ing Thomas could love me as he said he did, I
me understand
hopes. I decided I would just
couldn’t risk hurting myself by loving him.
what was keeping
develop and share my talents and
Once I understood this, I came to realize that me from fuller get on with life as a single member
I had to retrain myself to believe I was physi-
happiness.
of society. And then I met Thomas.
cally attractive, as my fiancé assured me I was.
He and I were instant best friends.
I also had to teach myself that I could have a But when romance came along with
sincere, loving relationship with a man and be
sincere friendship, I automatically married to him forever. I could quite naturally accept love from this man and give it in return.
I am grateful that Heavenly Father responded
Cast Not away
to my prayers by helping me understand what
therefore your
was keeping me from fuller happiness. I know
CoNfideNCe
that although we each may have different chal-
“Opposition turns
lenges, He will answer all of our prayers.
up almost anyplace
something good has
I also testify that He knows us each perfectly
happened. It can
and individually. He knows all that is lovable
happen when you are trying to get
and beautiful in us. The world teaches us to
an education. It can hit you after your
think we are unattractive, unacceptable, and
first month in your new mission field. It
unworthy of love if we don’t meet the arbitrary
certainly happens in matters of love and
standards it sets for us. Sometimes it’s hard to
marriage. . . . There are cautions and
turn away from such loud and convincing lies,
considerations to make, but once there
has been genuine il umination, beware
but our Father in Heaven will always be there
the temptation to retreat from a good
to remind us of our worth and of the value
thing. If it was right when you prayed
He sees in us. His standard, not the world’s, is
about it and trusted it and lived for it,
the true measure of our worth. The more we
it is right now. Don’t give up when the
believe and accept the Lord’s love, the more we
pressure mounts. . . . Face your doubts.
will love Him and trust in Him.
Master your fears. ‘Cast not away
therefore your confidence.’ Stay the
Now Thomas and I are happily married.
course and see the beauty of life unfold
Since our engagement I have learned not to
for you.”
sacrifice hope in order to bury pain. The Lord is
Elder Jeffrey R. Hol and of the Quorum of the
the one who can heal all pain, and as we trust
Twelve Apostles, “Cast Not Away Therefore Your
Him, He reminds us that we have everything to Confidence,” Brigham Young University devotional address, March 2, 1999.
hope for. ◼
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
35
Questions & Answers
I often feel overwhelmed because I don’t feel I measure up to all that’s expected of me in living the gospel. How can I learn to rejoice in the gospel when I feel like I may never be able to become or do all the Lord requires of me?
When I was on my mission in Brazil, I often strug- down at the Savior’s feet more quickly. In verse 41 and gled to feel my offerings were adequate. I would
42, Jesus said, “Martha, Martha, thou art careful and look at other missionaries and agonize over why I was troubled about many things:
not as valiant as they were. Then one day I remembered
“But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that some advice my father had given me while I was in the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.”
MTC. “The only way you’ll ever be able to eat an entire I felt the Spirit whisper to me that like Martha, I was elephant is one bite at a time.” Throughout the rest of my careful and troubled about many things, and because of mission, my mom would send me paper elephants with that, I was not doing the needful things.
more and more “bites” taken out of them, symbolizing I have since adjusted my priorities. Instead of saying, what I was able to accomplish one day at a time. I finally
“If I have time I will read my scriptures,” I now say, “I learned to be patient with myself and love what I was will read my scriptures and then accomplish what I doing instead of constantly criticizing myself for every-can.” In time, peace returned to my life because I knew thing I wasn’t doing. Often, we feel like we can’t posI was doing the things that Heavenly Father wanted me sibly do all that is asked of us, but if we remember that to do first.
Christ teaches us “line upon line, precept upon precept,”
It is easy to be like Martha when there are many things (2 Nephi 28:30) we can accomplish great things and
—often good things—that need our time, but I now find enjoy ourselves along the way.
I am able to accomplish so much more because my mind Katie Houston, Utah, USA
is focused on Heavenly Father’s will and His purposes for me. I know that if I continue to put the Lord first, He will Like many, I have had a difficult time combining spiritual bless me with strength, peace, and joy.
priorities with the other demands of life. Being the Kristine Nelson, Arizona, USA
mother of six children keeps me very busy, and it can be difficult to accomplish all the things I am supposed to do.
As a Scoutmaster of many years, I’ve learned a few One day, I finally took the matter to the Lord in prayer.
guiding principles from the Scout Oath. The first few rI
A few days later I was reading the story in Luke 10
words state, “On my honor, I will do my best to do my 2001 I©
about when the Savior came to visit Mary and Martha.
duty to God and my country.” These few lines parallel one rane
Mary sat at the feet of the Savior listening to His words of Christ’s powerful teachings in the New Testament.
ter al
while Martha was busy getting the house ready for
In Matthew 22, a lawyer asked Jesus, “Master, which is by W
visitors. Martha asked the Savior to “bid [Mary] there-the great commandment in the law?
fore that she help me” (verse 40). I imagine that she
“Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy also wanted to hear what the Savior was teaching and God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with y Heard His Word,
thought that with Mary’s help, she might be able to sit all thy mind.
Mar
36 E n s i g n
“This is the first and great commandment.
“And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt
It is easy to be
S ometimes it may seem that if we get out of bed in the morning and by bedtime have
love thy neighbour as thyself” (verses 36–39).
not managed to feed and tend the children,
like Martha
Both the Scout Oath and this scripture indi-
bake homemade bread, finish all the house-
when there are
cate that our first duty is to God and our
work, study the scriptures, do our home or
many things that
second is to our neighbor.
visiting teaching, attend the temple, do family
need our time,
It takes a lot to love the Lord and our
history, go to choir practice, prepare a lesson
but I now find
neighbor, but if we can remember what the
or talk for Sunday, and finish cross-stitching
that if I put the
Savior said next in verse 40, we gain better
the Ten Commandments, we have failed.
understanding: “On these two command-
Lord first, He will
Don’t worry—there is always tomorrow.
ments hang all the law and the prophets.”
bless me with
The key is faith. When we stay close to the
Loving the Lord and loving our neighbor is
strength, peace,
Lord and obey His commandments, we can be
as simple as it gets. If we can live by these
and joy.
prompted by the Holy Spirit to know what our
two rules, our light will shine so brightly
priorities are each day. We can also take com-
that our goodness will
fort in the fact that Heavenly Father knows us.
far outshine our
He knows our hearts, our trials, our strengths,
greatness.
and our weaknesses. We can start moving
George Hansen,
toward peace by accepting that He loves
Utah, USA
us, despite our imperfections and
limitations.
We wouldn’t ask our own
children to do everything
in one day while we sit
back and watch
and then chastise
them for the
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
37
jobs left undone. Heavenly Father
That same loving Father would
won’t either. I know that He loves
Step by Step
never leave me alone to endure the
us and will help us.
“Let me cite a hypo-
darkness of my trials. He is there.
Elaine Chamberlain, England
thetical example of
His light will guide me. As the
a dear sister in any
fierce winds of adversity blow, I will
As a divorced woman in the
ward, the one who has
remember His hand in all things.
Church, I often feel over-
perfect children who
Though I will certainly face
whelmed and worry that I do
never cause a distur-
other trials and adversity in my life,
not measure up. However, while
bance in church. She is the one working
I realize I can find joy through faith
reading the Book of Mormon, I
on her 20th generation in her family
in a loving Heavenly Father.
learned about the marvelous hope
history, keeps an immaculate home,
Jana Blackman, Utah, USA
and joy that a loving Heavenly
has memorized the book of Mark, and
Father provides even when the
makes wool sweaters for the orphaned
children in Romania. No disrespect, of
Although most of us understand
trials we face seem to overwhelm
that we do not need to
us. “And thus the Lord caused
course, intended for any of these worthy
become perfect overnight, we some-
stones to shine in darkness, to
goals. Now, when you get tempted to
times hear messages about things
give light unto men, women, and
throw your hands in the air and give
that are important for us to do and
children, that they might not cross
up because of this dear sister, please
then feel like we have to do them all
the great waters in darkness. . . .
remember you’re not competing with
at once. I’ve often felt reassurance
“And . . . the Lord God caused
her any more than I’m competing with
that this isn’t what the Lord wants.
that there should be a furious
the members of the Quorum of the
Although all of these things might
wind blow upon the face of the
Twelve in winning a 50-yard dash.
be significant at some time in our
waters, towards the promised
“The only thing you need to worry
lives, there will always be particular
land; and thus they were tossed
about is striving to be the best you can
things that are the most essential
upon the waves of the sea before
be. And how do you do that? You keep
for us to do now. In the April 2007
the wind. . . .
your eye on the goals that matter most
General Conference, President
“And it came to pass that the
in life, and you move towards them step
Henry B. Eyring suggested that we
M
wind did never cease to blow
by step.”
pray daily to find out from the Lord
towards the promised land while
Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin (1917–2008) of the Quorum what He would have us do that day.
ry MuseuO
they were upon the waters; and
of the Twelve Apostles, “One Step after Another,”
isth
Ensign, Nov. 2001, 26.
He promised that such a prayer
h C
thus they were driven forth before
would always be answered.1
the wind” (Ether 6:3, 5, 8).
I have found his promise to be true. If I make an effort tesy Chur
As I thought about the furious wind tossing the Jaredites to prayerfully consider my responsibilities, my priori-urO
upon the waves, it seemed the wind was more of a curse ties, and the time I have available on a given day, it soon rn, CO
than a blessing. But I felt impressed that without the wind, becomes clear to me what the Lord would have me do. I rie ObA
their journey would have been even more arduous and have found He never asks more of me than I can manage.
long. How long might it have taken to reach the prom-Letting the Lord help me determine what is most impor-
, by Anne M
ised land without those fierce winds? The wind, which tant each day gives me confidence in my decisions and light
appeared to be a trial—something to beset their journey—
assurance that He is pleased with me.
was a blessing from a loving Father.
Michael Green, Scotland
Children of
38 E n s i g n
walk in His path. At times we may hesitate
Share Your
IdeaS
Many years ago I attended a stake
Relief Society conference in Colorado.
and fear, but our Heavenly Father and our
A speaker used an analogy that really
Savior will always encourage us and help us
impressed me. She asked us to think about
because They know we can succeed. When
An upcoming
Q&A feature
how children learn to walk. We as adults
we stumble or fall down, They do not berate
wil focus on the
give encouragement and praise. We stretch
us or scold us or give up on us. They con-
following topic:
out our arms and invite them to come to us.
tinue to stretch out Their arms and beckon
I have heard
When just learning, children are often a bit
us to “come.” They know we can succeed,
Church leaders say
fearful and hesitant, but with our continued
and They do not love us less because of our
that those of us who
encouragement, they continue to try. They
stumbling.
come from dysfunc-
may only get one step taken before they fall,
Keeping in mind the image of our
tional homes can be
but we don’t berate them or scold them or
Heavenly Father with outstretched arms, as
“cycle breakers.” I
give up on them. We pick them up and help
mortal parents do to their learning child,
want to build a life
them because we know that they can suc-
can help us through our trials. Accepting His
founded on righteous
cessfully learn to walk. We do not love them
encouragement and love can give us the faith
traditions, but I’m
less because of their stumbling.
we need to strive to do better.
not sure how I can
She likened that to our relationship with
Jan Payne, Iowa, USA ◼
be and do something
our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. God
Note
different than what
sent us down here to learn His ways and to
1. Henry B. Eyring, “This Day,” Ensign, May 2007, 89.
I’ve been shown and
taught my whole life.
Where do I start?
If you would like
When we stumble or fall down, Heavenly
to share your ideas,
Father and Jesus Christ do not give up on
please label your
us. They continue to stretch out their arms
submission “Cycle
and beckon us to “come.”
Breaker” and fol ow
the guidelines under
“Do You Have a
Story to Tel ” on
page 2. Please limit
submissions to 500
words and submit
them by March 18.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
39
By David M. McConkie
First Counselor in the Sunday
School General Presidency
Learning to Hear
and Understand the
Spirit
One of the most important things we can do is learn to hear and follow the promptings of the Spirit.
My father grew up in the he knelt and asked Heavenly Father gospel, he often spoke of his experi-small town of Monticello,
to help him find his pocketknife. He
ence on the dusty trail in Monticello
Utah. When he was seven,
climbed back on his horse, turned
when the Lord heard and answered
one of his daily chores was to bring
around, and rode back down the
the prayer of a “freckle-faced seven-
the family’s cows in from their pas-
trail. After some distance his horse
year-old boy.”
ture. His prized possession was his
stopped. Dad climbed off the horse
In his later years he told us that he
pocketknife, which he always kept
and put his hand into the deep dust
had learned something else from this
with him. One day as he was rid-
on the trail. There, buried in the dust,
childhood experience. With a twinkle
ing his horse to fetch the cows, he
he found his prized pocketknife. He
in his eye, he said, “I learned that God
reached into his pocket for his knife. knew that the Lord had heard and can speak to horses!”
To his dismay he realized he had
answered his prayer.
My father’s experience as a young
lost it somewhere along the trail. He
Because he had learned to listen
boy left a lasting impression on him
was heartbroken, but he believed
to and act upon the whisperings of
because it was the beginning of his
what he had been taught by his
the Spirit, my father was blessed to
personal spiritual education. This
ewbold n
father and mother: God hears and
see the hand of the Lord on many
was when he learned for himself that
G
answers prayers.
occasions throughout his life. He
God hears prayers. This was when he
He stopped his horse and slid off
witnessed many miracles. Yet when
began, as the Prophet Joseph Smith
tIons by Gre
its bare back to the ground. There
he gathered his family to teach us the
termed it, to learn the Spirit of God. 1
Illustra
40 E n s i g n
The Gift of the Holy Ghost
is the right, when we are worthy of it,
The Prophet Joseph Smith taught
The Savior promised His Apostles
to the constant companionship of the
that the Spirit of God can be learned
that after He left them, they would
third member of the Godhead.
and that “by learning the Spirit of God
enjoy the gift of the Holy Ghost. He
The companionship of the Holy
and understanding it, you may grow
said, “The Comforter, which is the
Ghost is one of the greatest bless-
into the principle of revelation, until
Holy Ghost, whom the Father will
ings we can enjoy in mortality. Elder
you become perfect in Christ Jesus.” 3
send in my name, he shall teach you
Bruce R. McConkie (1915–85) of the
One of the most important things
all things, and bring all things to your
Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said:
we can do is learn the Spirit of God—
remembrance, whatsoever I have said
“Men ought—above all things in
learn to hear and follow the prompt-
unto you” ( John 14:26). This promise
this world—to seek for the guidance
ings of the Spirit. If we so desire and
was fulfilled on the day of Pentecost.
of the Holy Spirit. There is nothing as
are worthy, the Lord will school us in
Members of The Church of Jesus
important as having the companion-
the principle of revelation.
Christ of Latter-day Saints are entitled
ship of the Holy Ghost. . . .
to this same gift. After we are baptized,
“There is no price too high, no
Learning to Listen and to Act
the gift of the Holy Ghost is conferred
labor too onerous, no struggle too
To learn the Spirit of God, we
upon us by the laying on of hands by
severe, no sacrifice too great, if out
must learn to listen with our hearts.
one who is authorized to administer
of it all we receive and enjoy the gift
President Boyd K. Packer, President of
the ordinances of the gospel. This gift
of the Holy Ghost.” 2
the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles,
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
41
Y o u t h
CheCk the tire
By Andrew M. Wright
couldn’t shake the feeling. I looked
able to fix the flat just minutes before
back over my shoulder and then
the service station closed for the
When I was 15, my family and I
took a vacation from our home
stopped. The impression came to my
night. I don’t know what would have
in Arizona to the central United States.
mind: “Check the back tire.” It was
happened if I had ignored the prompt-
We drove through many states, includ-
so forceful I couldn’t ignore it.
ing. But I do know that because I
ing Kansas, Texas, Arkansas, Missouri,
I approached the rear of the van
responded, we were able to continue
and Illinois.
and heard a hissing sound. Sure
our trip safely and conveniently.
Our vacation went well. We learned enough, our right rear tire had a leak Since that incident, I’m always
to enjoy each other’s company during
and was quickly going flat. I ran to
reassured of the power of the Holy
the long van rides from place to place.
get my dad, who had already gone
Ghost and how truly blessed we are
As we pul ed into a restaurant one
into the restaurant with the rest of
as members of the Church to have
evening, we were al anxious to grab
the family.
that special line of communication. I
a bite to eat. As we got out of our
My father took the van down
am grateful for that experience, for it
van, I suddenly had a silent but pow-
the road to a gas station before the
wil stay with me, forever reminding
erful impression that told me to look
tire went completely flat. Since the
me that our Father in Heaven loves,
at the back tire on our van. I started
tire wasn’t damaged, the repair was
cares, and watches out for all of His
to walk toward the restaurant, but I
inexpensive and quick. And we were
children.
said: “The Spirit is a still, small voice—a
Of utmost importance in our school-
fulness at the first, but received grace
voice that is felt rather than heard. It is a ing process is our responsibility to for grace” (D&C 93:12), so also, as we
spiritual voice that comes into the mind act, without delay, in accordance with keep His commandments, we will
as a thought put into your heart.” 4
the spiritual promptings we receive.
“receive grace for grace” (D&C 93:20;
President Packer also taught:
President Thomas S. Monson stated:
see also John 1:16) and “line upon line,
useum
“Inspiration comes more easily in
“We watch. We wait. We listen for that
precept upon precept” (2 Nephi 28:30).
Y m
peaceful settings. Such words as
still, small voice. When it speaks, wise
Our schooling process is often as grad-
istorh
quiet, still, peaceable, Comforter
men and women obey. Promptings of
ual as the descent of the dews from
hurch c
abound in the scriptures: ‘Be still, and the Spirit are not to be postponed.” 6
heaven (see D&C 121:45; 128:19).
Y of
know that I am God.’ (Ps. 46:10; italics
Learning to hear and understand
Elder Richard G. Scott of the
tes
added.) And the promise, ‘You shall
the Spirit is a gradual and continuous
Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
D, cour
receive my Spirit, the Holy Ghost,
process. The Savior said, “He that
has taught that “there is no simple
even the Comforter, which shall teach receiveth light, and continueth in formula or technique that would
you the peaceable things of the king-
God, receiveth more light; and that
immediately allow [us] to master the
Dan WeggelanBY
dom.’ (D&C 36:2; italics added).”
light groweth brighter and brighter
ability to be guided by the voice of
President Packer added: “While we until the perfect day” (D&C 50:24).
the Spirit.” Rather, “our Father expects
may invite this communication, it can
“For unto him that receiveth I will
[us] to learn how to obtain that divine
never be forced! If we try to force it,
give more” (2 Nephi 28:30).
help by exercising faith in Him and
we may be deceived.” 5
Just as Christ “received not of the
His Holy Son, Jesus Christ.”
trait of Brigham Young
Por
42 E n s i g n
A Privilege
Elder Scott continued: “What may
Learning to hear and understand
And duty
appear initially to be a daunting task
the Spirit takes considerable effort. But
“If you want the
will be much easier to manage over
the Lord has promised that the faithful
mind and wil of
time as you consistently strive to recog-
will “receive revelation upon revela-
God . . . , get it,
it is just as much
nize and follow feelings prompted by
tion, knowledge upon knowledge,
your privilege as of any other mem-
the Spirit. Your confidence in the direc-
that [they may] know the mysteries
ber of the Church and Kingdom of
tion you receive from the Holy Ghost
and peaceable things—that which
God. It is your privilege and duty
will also become stronger,” and “your
bringeth joy, that which bringeth life
to live so that you know when the
confidence in the impressions you feel
eternal” (D&C 42:61). ◼
word of the Lord is spoken to you
can become more certain than your
and when the mind of the Lord is
Notes
revealed to you. I say it is your duty
dependence on what you see or hear.” 7
1. See Teachings of Presidents of the Church:
Joseph Smith (2007), 132.
to live so as to know and under-
As part of our schooling process,
2. Bruce R. McConkie, A New Witness for the
Articles of Faith (1985), 253.
stand all these things.”
the Lord will help us to see the results, 3. Teachings: Joseph Smith, 132.
President Brigham Young (1801–77), Teachings
in our own life and in the lives of
4. Boyd K. Packer, “The Cloven Tongues of
Fire,”
of Presidents of the Church: Brigham Young
Liahona, July 2000, 10; Ensign, May (1997), 68.
others, of our acting upon the prompt-
2000, 8.
5. Boyd K. Packer, “Reverence Invites
ings we receive from the Spirit. These
Revelation,” Ensign, Nov. 1991, 21.
experiences will strengthen our faith
6. Thomas S. Monson, “The Spirit Giveth Life,”
Liahona and Ensign, June 1997, 4.
and give us greater courage to act in
7. Richard G. Scott, “To Acquire Spiritual
Guidance,” Liahona and Ensign, Nov. 2009, the future.
6–7.
F e b r u a r y 2 0 1 1
43
Revelation
Pouring Down from Heaven
By Adam olson
A
Church Magazines
heavy spray soaks those who get too
least Saint may know all things as fast as he is
close to Pulhapanzak Falls in Honduras.
able to bear them.” 1
But José Santiago Castillo doesn’t mind.
“Before being baptized, I asked Heavenly
To José, the pouring water represents a promise
Father to confirm that what He had revealed to
that has been meaningful to him since Heavenly
me was true: the Book of Mormon, the Word of
Father first answered his prayers about the gospel.
Wisdom, tithing,” says José, now serving as elders
“If we want wisdom, we can ask,” José says
quorum president. “Asking Him is how we get
(see James 1:5). “Just as a man couldn’t stop this answers.” (See Moses 1:18.)
water, the Lord promises He will pour down
However, we must prepare ourselves to
knowledge upon the Saints.” (See D&C 121:33.)
receive revelation. “If we want to get wet,
José’s experience in the Church has taught
we have to get in the water,” José says. “If we
him that a testimony grows line upon line, but
want revelation, we must go where revelation
lson
that it doesn’t have to be a slow process. There is will fall. We must be where we should be, doing o a flood of revelation available.
what we should be doing. We learn many things dam C. a The Prophet Joseph Smith taught, “God hath
if we are diligent.” (See 1 Nephi 15:8–11.) ◼
Ph by
not revealed anything to Joseph, but what He
Note
1. Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Smith will make known unto the Twelve, and even the
(2007), 268.
Photogra
44 E n s i g n
“As well might man stretch
forth his puny arm to stop
the Missouri river in its
decreed course, or to turn
it up stream, as to hinder
the Almighty from pour-
ing down knowledge from
heaven upon the heads
of the Latter-day Saints”
(D&C 121:33).
As th
e Savior’s undershepherds,
we have the responsibility to “reach
out and rescue those who have
fallen by the wayside.”
of the
Lost and
found
ablesIn chapter 15 of the Gospel
of Luke, the Savior uses three
parables to teach the worth
of a soul, showing us how to find
and return that which is lost to
the fold of faith and family.
In the parables, the sheep
wanders, the piece of silver is lost,
and the prodigal son wastes his
inheritance in riotous living. But
the shepherd searches the wil-
derness, the woman sweeps the
house, and the forgiving father
y
watches for his son’s return, ever
. McKa
ready with an embrace and a
T a
Parwarm welcome home. rober
The Savior’s parables—and the Tions by
three vignettes by Church leaders Tra
that follow—remind us that as
T; illus
His undershepherds, we have the
responsibility to “reach out and
va K. Teicher
rescue those who have fallen by
by Miner
the wayside, that not one precious
soul will be lost.” 1
Note
1. Thomas S. Monson, “Stand in Your
Appointed Place,” Liahona and Ensign, May 2003, 57.
Rescue of the Lost Lamb,